Christmas is for families

When I was just a child I loved Christmas. But when my husband took his life and my son died of a disease. I gave up Christmas. The month of nov and dec are my hards time. My son dies right before thanksgiving his birthday is the 11 of dec then you get Christmas. You would think it would get easer but it doesn't. I don't trust nobody to get in a relationship not even a girlfriend. I will not get close again it's to painful. Bum hum bug I am mad and angry at the world and hate life. Whew I feel better to get that off my chest. Life isn't fare. But I'm going day by day :)